wut up FOOLZ

Fun fact: I was never a big fan of April Fool’s as a kid. I wasn’t creative enough to think up pranks or prepared enough to carry them out. Usually I’d just end up lying to people- but this isn’t as fun or easy as it sounds. It has to be timed perfectly if you want to yell APRILFOOLZ before they burst into tears or punch you in the face, so honestly, it’s not even worth the trouble. Thankfully for people like me, when real-life is fail, there’s always somewhere to turn. The Internet. Where 4pr1L f00Ls is fucking AWESOME.
So, for anyone who missed the foolery, here’s a nice little compilation:

Gmail
Gmail turned 5 years old today, hooray! To celebrate, they released Autopilot an automatic message-answering service powered by their artificial intelligence bot, CADIE (Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity). Apparently, CADIE even has its own blog, so you can feel safe that it sufficiently comprehends human emotions and insight.
edit: damnit, the link is broken now, I’m out looking for a screenshot. WANT PANDAS BACK.
edit2: CADIE HAS A YOUTUBE CHANNEL!!

Google Mobil
Has created Brainsearch, which is basically a way to ctrl+f your brain, you know for when you just can’t think of the right … er… damn I lost it.

Gizmodo:
In honor of the Conficker worm, Gizmodo was taken over virus. Each post was flooded with spam-tastic images and nonsense numbers that perfectly capture the eloquence and artistic expression of typical junk mail. They continued this for the whole day and even sent out an apology message for readers that were annoyed by teh ne3w layoutz.

Lifehacker:
Since we all know how much Microsoft loves Google, Lifehacker posted a code that allows them to unite! Better Windows Live is a Greasemonkey script that reinterprets any Windows Live webpages as the Google counterpart. (Absolutely genius! Too bad I already use Google for everything…)

Team Fortress 2
The Sniper introduced a new weapon- JARATE! First seen in Sniper promo, these jars of pee (karate in a jar!) “wreak havoc on your opponent’s mental state, psychological well-being and trust in the inherent goodness of his fellow man.” Sweeeeet.

Xbox
Xbox is coming out with a new interactive music game Alpine Legend. One player yodels, the other plays an alphorn. WANT.

FilmDrunk
So apparently, George Clooney and your mom made a porno. Yeah, YOUR mom. (via Variety)

Youtube
To enhance the viewing experience, Youtube flipped its videos. Now people from Australia can finally understand what’s going on! Surprisingly, Chemical Brothers videos still hurt your head.

The Guardian
Staying ahead in media distribution, the Guardian will stop printing newspapers and instead publish every story on it’s twitter page. After all, “experts say any story can be told in 140 characters.” Soon the entire archive will be translated, says journalist/tweeter Rio Palof.

Others I don’t feel like writing about:
Wii fit is cute, Google Chrome in 3D, Picasa adds red eye, BMW’s Magnetic Tow Technology, Macetech’s Stealth CapsLocker…

If you saw some good ones I don’t have: leave a comment with the link, your name, bank account number, and mother’s maiden name so I can add them to the post!

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